Age of Kill

I own a goodly amount of low-budget, Lahnden-set actioners by producer Jonathan Southcott, and usually they are reliably bullet-shredded, if somewhat uninspired thug-soaked thrillers, with, perhaps, the sole exception being diamond geezer Danny Dyer's grisly chav-killer 'Vendetta'! The pacey, slick-looking 'Age of Kill' finds our gun grey, gun-happy glamourpuss hero Blake (Martin Kemp), a magnificently moody, dead-eyed government spook, renowned for his unusually keen marksmanship, and Martini cool demeanour in the diabolical midst of a maniacal terror plot, with his beloved daughter kidnapped by a prototypical terrorist psycho, resplendent in black bally, and a natty red boiler suit! The resourceful Blake must now undertake his deadliest mission thus far, heroically rescue his gobby progeny, protect some skinny brass (April Pearson), all the while keeping his immaculately coiffed barnet in perfect nick, which the cinematically studly Kemp does with enviable panache! At its best, Neil Jones's 'Age of Kill' is pure, unfiltered Seagal tosh, and it even has its own spiffing, terse-sounding Seagal-esque moniker! While the tired text is frequently prosaic, the dynamically dashing, gimlet-eyed Martin Kemp appears wholly energized, making for a lean, handsome, sharp-shooting tough guy, while Patrick Bergin just seems happy to be working, the charisma-bypass Dani Dyer is, thankfully, barely in it, and Bruce 'Warlock' Payne is the least convincing prime minister since Boris Johnson! I dug it, and, to his credit, stolid actor Nick Moran delivers the film's most credible performance as the sleazy, smoothly sinister far-right rabble-rouser Roy Dixon. If, like me, you enjoyed J. K Amalou's equally formulaic Gary & Martin Kemp-starring gangster flick 'Assassin' you will know exactly what to expect here. (It might have been considerably more entertaining overall if they got someone from Sigue Sigue Sputnik to play the voicebox-gibbering villain, jus' sayin'!)

There are several glaring errors with the concept of Sam Blake being ex-special forces, not least that he chooses to take down a target from a multi-story car park, in the middle of the day. He is then so surprised by the appearance of Mr and Mrs Average, returning to their car, he completely loses his composure, makes a big scene and wheel-spins out of the building leaving two frightened and confused eyewitnesses and - more importantly - his spent cartridge case (or evidence, as forensic services like to call it). But the biggest fail, in my opinion, was him walking into a battle-cruiser (boozer) carrying his lo-tech sniper rifle (albeit in a flight case), following his mark into the karzy (toilets) and going through a very prolonged punch-up with him; in black ops terms, the equivalent of strapping a large number of pots, pans, bells and cymbals to your kit before commencing a covert op. After he's finally managed to neutralise the target, he comes back out of the bogs (toilets) and is recognised by one of the customers. He immediately pulls out a Glock (never heard of a silencer, Mr Green Beret?) and leaves the nuclear sub (pub) with no sign of the big black gun case with which he had arrived - presumably a bit of a handicap for a crack-shot sniper with several target left on his to-do list.

Poor casting and worse acting make this a cringe fest . I guess if you have the hots for Mr Kemp you may watch to the end.

This might actually be the first bad British movie I've ever seen. The plot concerns the following : A military sniper played by an actor exactly 10 years too old for the part has his daughter kidnapped by Mysterious Man who will kill her if he doesn't kill 6 people he chooses in 6 hours. Got it? Besides the glaring fact that there are ninety ways for him to get out of it with his supposed "expertese" and all, he does his bidding. Prepare for the most amateur and laughable fight scenes while he does. At one point he dispatches a victim and Mysterious Figure tells him good : "Now where are you?" In other words, he's NOT being watched. So....just fake it and move on. When he's chased by a helicopter, I say again, a HELICOPTER, he takes 4 shots at it with a handgun. It simply vanishes. It ends with a surprise that anyone could see coming followed by a "lesson learned" moral from an American who loves the Twilight Zone. This is a movie that desperately needed Jason Statham and a rewrite.

The film starts of with every good intention and direction of being a good thriller. After that it becomes the usual Johnathan Sothcott produced mish mash of bad acting by miss matched characters to roles that makes the film unbelievable. It is a short film which makes you think that they ran out of money whilst making it, and the script looks like it was made up as they went along. Shame ... cracking Brit Cast who deserve better.

Sam Blake (Martin Kemp) is an MI 6 assassin. He wakes up to a phone call ordering him to kill 6 people in 6 hours or else his daughter (Carla Cresswell) will die. Sam recently had a botched trip to Spain where he was ordered to kill a man who turned out not to be the target. Also there is a bad subplot of immigration phobia in "Londonistan." How many of these films are they going to make? A man must do something for a stranger on the other end of the phone or else. I just saw "7 Cases" and this type of film is getting old. Apparently every studio feels obligated to make one or else. This film was low budget. Anouska Mond as the investigator was interesting as she was able to get to every crime scenes within minutes, assess the situation, question witnesses and have enough time to make it back to Scotland Yard, and do more investigating before the next killing an hour later. Martin Kemp wasn't really exciting, so they added Lucy Pindar to the script. Guide: F-bomb. No sex or nudity.

Let me begin by saying I really don't delight in rubbishing the work of anyone who's had the guts to make a movie. In this case, however, I feel the need to stick my head out of the trench. I'll start with the hero: Martin Kemp isn't a bad actor, but I suspect he got the role because he looks more like an action hero than the others. And the antagonist, well, despite the voice-changer, I recognised Phil Davis' voice within two lines of dialogue - which left me asking "how is he in two places at once?" throughout almost the entire film. I only thank the director for not making it Dexter Fletcher or I may have left the film to fulfil a subconscious desire for a Big Mac (that's not a reflection of Dexter's acting - it's just I'm reliably informed he does the V/O for McD's TV ads). There are several glaring errors with the concept of Sam Blake being ex-special forces, not least that he chooses to take down a target from a multi-story car park, in the middle of the day. He is then so surprised by the appearance of Mr and Mrs Average, returning to their car, he completely loses his composure, makes a big scene and wheel-spins out of the building leaving two frightened and confused eyewitnesses and - more importantly - his spent cartridge case (or evidence, as forensic services like to call it). But the biggest fail, in my opinion, was him walking into a battle-cruiser (boozer) carrying his lo-tech sniper rifle (albeit in a flight case), following his mark into the karzy (toilets) and going through a very prolonged punch-up with him; in black ops terms, the equivalent of strapping a large number of pots, pans, bells and cymbals to your kit before commencing a covert op. After he's finally managed to neutralise the target, he comes back out of the bogs (toilets) and is recognised by one of the customers. He immediately pulls out a Glock (never heard of a silencer, Mr Green Beret?) and leaves the nuclear sub (pub) with no sign of the big black gun case with which he had arrived - presumably a bit of a handicap for a crack-shot sniper with several target left on his to-do list. It's not all bad. Nick Moran provides a very convincing right-wing anti-immigration activist and, despite the hole in the plot described previously, Phil Davis gives us a very convincing baddie. I wish I had more good things to say, but I really don't. Sorry.

I am surprised Phil Davies and Nick Moran got involved in this as decent actors. Martin Kemp wasn't bad but a lot of the acting by several other cast members was appalling. Worst of all was the miscast female Detective who sounded and looked about 12. Very uncredible. why she was given this part I can only guess. This was in essence a good plot but really didn't come together. I can only imagine that a lot of people involved in this film will look back and cringe. A shame, if the casting had been better , this could have been decent. Travelling for sometime, I was looking forward to seeing a British film and getting a slice of England but was really disappointed.

OK, first the negatives - it's low budget and it shows here and there so don't go expecting a multi-million dollar film. Also one actress is a bit miscast but if you put those couple of minor quibbles to one side and there really is a LOT to enjoy here. This film references loads of top notch US films but manages to put it's own UK spin on them with some good twists and turns. Martin Kemp is really good as the sniper and there's great support from Patrick Bergin, Phil Davies and Nick Moran. Having seen lots of other British films this one made a nice change as there were no gangsters (or strip clubs). I would definitely recommend giving this a go.

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